Left looking can be hazardous to your health

We saw our pediatrician for the first time yesterday (in Germany, a midwife visits your house for ten days following the birth, so the first peds visit can be a bit later). All is healthy, except for two things:

1. What was the adorable quirk of left looking needs to start being corrected, lest we actually risk longer-term damage (although Ruben Zoolander has a nice ring to it, as several have pointed out). At this point, simply orienting him so the interesting stuff is to the right should be plenty. Swings and beds have been rotated accordingly.

2. Owing to his father, Ruben has canoe paddles for feet, and having been squished in the womb and then often swaddled, they are a bit too upturned (dorsiflexed). We need to massage them regularly to straighten them out. Although, with two runner parents, perhaps he’ll have a Forrest Gump moment.

He’s 10 1/2 pounds and 23 inches, a healthy weight and >90th percentile in height. A chip off the old block.

Amidst all this, I kept checking last night to see if he was sleeping with his head to the left (which he was), and we also turned the swing and music off, hoping to wean him off motion and noise-filled slumber (in anticipation of a trip next month). He had a rough night, getting up several times. He and I had a staredown for the last hour or so, and I was not going to pick him up, knowing he’d eaten recently, and deciding, as father knows best, that he was just being a grumpo. When he finally broke me, I picked him up to find he’d peed through his clothes, swaddle, and onto his swing. Besides earning the nickname “puddle of urine” (cue Mark Aronoff laugh), this reminded me I’m an idiot. Serves me right for entering into a pissing contest with an incontinent…

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